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Brittany Experiences Capitalism

Published August 15, 2014 by Britt

Good evening, readers. I hope my absence hasn’t scarred you all terribly. I’ve had probably one of the busiest summers of my life, and god knows where it’s gone. I want it back.

I’m proud of myself for having most of my summer assignments done, unlike last year where I spent two weeks crying inside as I scrambled to get as much done as possible.

The title of the thread refers to my experiences in the working world, which is primarily the thing that has been eating my time up. Because if I want to make myself a meaningful human being in America, I must have money. To have money, I must have a job. That’s capitalism. I work at a waterpark, which isn’t that terrible, actually. I haven’t experienced any form of atrocious customers, nor have I hated the job. It’s a pleasant, minimum wage job that high schoolers can do. The only real problem I have with it is that my uniform makes me feel like Jimmy Buffett.

It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.

But other than that, it’s not terrible. Everyone I work with is really nice, and I’m not terrible at customer service. I haven’t wanted to scream at any customers. I have, however, been hit on. Multiple times. And I’m hardcore being shipped by my mother with a lifeguard.

For example, I was working at the ice cream stand and I served a little girl. Her brother and grandfather come over, thank me for being nice to her, and leave. Later on the brother comes over with the grandfather and gets some ice cream for himself. The grandfather leaves, and he stays to eat his ice cream, chatting with me, dancing to the Cotton Eyed Joe that they put on the radio during like a dance hour thingy, and not really being a nuisance to anybody (not that I had any customers at that point for him to bother), so I let him stay. When he finishes his ice cream, he leaves. Later his grandfather comes back for some popcorn and he says “My grandson really liked you. He said he wished he was older. He’s 11 now.” So I laugh and I’m a little creeped out, but I let it go. And I told my boss later and he thought it was funny. I thought it was funny in hindsight. But I didn’t realize a Hawaiian print shirt made my dating game stronger.

I don’t even think Elvis is pulling this off. The other option was One Direction and no thank you. Seriously. Googling “hawaiian print shirt hot” gives you nothing. Try it.

The waterpark, however, must close for the winter, so I need to look into other options. I recently looked at the local used bookstore down the road from my house and he actually remembered me and everything, and he asked me to leave an application there. I’ve been dreaming about having that job for ages, and getting that particular job was what got me into job hunting for a while.

But recently I took a couple weeks off because I had this major internship for school I had to do at a law firm. I wasn’t sure what to expect, I had heard mixed reviews about most of the internships my friends have had, and so I was a little hesitant, but then I got there and met everyone and thought it was fabulous. We went to court one day, and this guy behind us realized he was in the wrong courtroom. So he asks the bailiff to take him to the right one, and he gets up to start doing the “I need to poop” walk. He then lets out a massive fart, and left the room a little bit quicker than before. Everyone was trying hard not to bust out laughing in the middle of the courtroom but I was dying in the car ride back to the office.

I was also arguably the best dressed person there. I rock the suits. Rock them hard.

Speaking of internships, we come to the big announcement I have for tonight.

A friend of mine name Jonathan who runs ZEJ Roleplaying, the website I admin at, recently encouraged me to apply for an internship at PopWrapped, a news website that covers pop culture, entertainment, and politics. I of course said “sure why not” and he put in a good word for me with his boss. Last night I received an email saying “hey welcome aboard!” and now I’m a staff writer! I’m in the phase of getting everything set up, but it’s 2-3 articles a week and it’s a relatively big news website so it’s making me more well known. I hope you all follow me there, and I’m really excited to be working there. Maybe this will help me figure out what to do with my life later on. Interning like this really helps you figure out whether or not you hate something or love something, and I’m hoping this taste of the world of journalism is a good one.

 

Yes, I promise to be more active here now. I’m sorry.

Brittany, where have you been???

Published January 13, 2013 by Britt

This is that weird announcement post before I actually make a post that is more relevant and interesting. It’s also regarding a combination of things that’s mainly shameless plugs.

Now where have I been?

Laying on my couch or in my bed. Sleeping. I’ve just been super exhausted and have had no desire to walk upstairs and get on my laptop. I also watched a movie with some friends of mine. That was fun.

Malaika for Life

So, this woman came and visited my school the other day. She graduated from there, and while she was in college she went to Tanzania to film a documentary. In Tanzania, she caught malaria, which is a normal thing there, and according to her it changed her life. So she started a non-profit organization selling bracelets. 70% of the funds they raise go toward the treatment of Malaria, because the medicine is crazy cheap for us, but not for the people in Africa. So I strongly encourage you to go buy a bracelet from her. They’re $15 online.

Check out her site.

 

Let’s Send a Guy to Space

So, there’s this guy. His lifelong dream is to go to space. He’s in 35th place right now in the vote count, sadly, and the guy in first doesn’t really give any f*cks anyway. So, go vote for him and we’ll say we helped an astronaut. And when he finally builds a Death Star (unlike the White House), or walks on Mars or whatever, we can say we know him or helped get him there or whatever. Doesn’t cost you any money or anything. Just do the human test and vote.

Vote here.

 

I think that’s pretty much it. I’m going to go write up a review now. My posting schedule shall return to normal.

Look, I have a blog.

Published January 6, 2013 by Britt

So, this is my first post. I haven’t done anything significant really, but I did go over to my aunt and uncle’s house to go watch the Seahawks and Redskins game.

Now, note I do not like sports at all. I find them boring, I don’t understand them, and I always leave the room when my dad is watching them. I was mainly here for the food. I think my commentary of sports is far more interesting than the commentators’ though.

“Look, he’s wearing a fanny pack for his trail mix.”

“Yay, he’s kicking the ball.”

“Yay, he’s running with the ball.”

“Yay, he’s throwing the ball.”

“Run, Forrest! Run!”

“This isn’t even a football. The Europeans have soccer as a football. That is a handegg.”

It’s true though. That ball isn’t even round. It’s a pointy egg. I don’t understand why anyone finds this stuff interesting, call it a profession even. It’s stupid.

Needless to say, my father was not thrilled, and told me to bury my head in my book.

Oh, and there were three kids there, ages 9, 7, and 5. They got really quiet, and so they sent me to go check on them. Upon my arrival I saw that the children had managed to kidnap the platter of Rice Krispies Treats and were snacking on them. It was the five year old’s doing, apparently. Not sure how they managed to do it, but I confiscated the remaining Rice Krispies. They were giggling way too hard.

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