On my bus we get into very strange discussions regarding anything and everything. This being said, the people discussing here are myself, Dinosaur, and Watson. We’re calling them names here that I put them in my phone contacts and so they don’t get mad at me later for revealing names. BE HAPPY, MAN.
Somehow, the other day we trailed into a discussion regarding the cursed MIDDLE FINGER.
[scary music plays in the distance as lightning flashes]
As we all know, the middle finger means “f*ck you.” But the real question we came to was what exactly made it bad?
So after a little bit of Googling, we came to find a nice history lesson. You’ll like this.
Before the Battle of Agincourt, the French were totally believing that they were going to win, just like any old army would. Which army WOULDN’T want to win? At the time, their enemies, the English, used these really cool longbows made of yew. And you had to have your middle finger to draw them. So the French said that they would cut the middle finger off of any English soldier they captured, making it impossible for them to fight.
The English, probably drunken after the celebrations, go running around the French with their middle finger up as a taunt to say that they lost.
Now here is where the F-bomb comes in. Drawing a English longbow was called “plucking the yew.” And they were screaming “Pluck yew! Pluck yew! We can still pluck yew!” As people said it more, this as more of a joke, that “pl” turned into an “f.”
Really, the middle finger doesn’t mean anything at all. Does it mean I recommend using it on someone of importance, like your mom or boss or teacher or Obama? Nope. I’m just saying if your friends/enemies/peasants/serfs/minions elect to use it on you, don’t worry. Do what Dinosaur does: “That’s a nice finger you have there.”